


Cross My Heart (And Die)

by TheSleepingKnight



Category: Parahumans Series - Wildbow
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Mild Hurt/Comfort, SmugBug - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-12-29 21:52:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18302612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSleepingKnight/pseuds/TheSleepingKnight
Summary: Who is she, again?





	Cross My Heart (And Die)

The first thing that came back to her was touch. The sensation of something warm and fuzzy, wrapped around her shoulders. Cloth? Cool, flitting touches across her body, skin brushing against skin with fleeting contact, like they were afraid to touch her.

Hearing came back next, muffled and far away, as if someone had came and stuffed cotton in her ears. Feet pounded against the ground, voices whispered and murmured and barked at each other, an unintelligible soundtrack of noise. 

Another fluttering touch on...Her face? She couldn’t tell. Everything was out of order— her body felt like a puzzle that had been rearranged wrong. Up was down and down was up. She didn’t think she could move even if she wanted to.

What… 

What had happened to her?

More noises, growing louder with intensity. The soft sensation left, and the noises died. She thought she heard… footfall. The thumping of heavy bodies walking across wood. 

The soft, cool touch came back. She liked it. Butterfly wings, flitting around her.

A voice to match the touch in her ear.  A few words, in a slow, soft cadence. She liked that voice. It was calming. 

Slowly, the soft noise turned into something she could understand.

“Taylor? It’s me. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“Yes.” She said. “I understand you.” Her vision was still dark and blurry, the world a chaotic swirl of colors and mirrors. Yellow, purple and green filled her world. 

“Good. Do you remember anything?” The voice continued, tone still patient and soft.

“Um. No.”

“That’s okay, I expected that. You’re experiencing blurry vision, disorientation, yeah?”

“Yes.” Taylor briefly wondered how she knew that, but another question became far more pressing. Um. Can I ask you something?” 

“Of course, Taylor.” The voice replied. 

“Um...who’s Taylor?” She asked, imagining her face flushing, wherever that was. 

“It’s you. Your name is Taylor.”

“Oh! Okay. That’s what I thought but I wasn’t sure and um… follow up question. Who are you?” Really, this was just mortifying. 

“I’m Lisa, honey. I’m your friend.” It was strange, Taylor reflected, how Lisa said that statement with such a heavy and weary tone. 

“Okay. That’s nice. I’m sorry I don’t remember you.” There was a long and awkward pause. Taylor felt the urge to fidget, but her body wasn’t with the program yet. “Are...are we good friends?”

“Yes, Taylor. We’re very good friends. The best of friends.” 

“Oh good. I’m sorry I don’t remember any of it.” Taylor desperately wanted to reach out, do... _ something,  _ but nothing was happening. She was a puppet with her strings cut. 

“It’s okay. The amnesia isn’t your fault.” 

_ Oh god, _ Taylor thought. Amnesia? That...was bad. That was really bad. What the hell had happened to her?

“So… how did I-”

“End up like this?” Lisa finished her sentence for her, voice dripping with exhaustion.

“Uh. Yeah. How did you-”

“Know what you’re going to stay?””    


“...that’s really creepy.” Taylor commented. 

“I know. Old habits.” A small moment of silence. “Look, Taylor… you’re a cape.”

“I- I am? I have  _ powers?”  _

“Yes, dear. You do. You saved my life… for what must have been the hundredth time.” Lisa’s voice started sounding more strangled, like something was stuck in it. “You’re really brave, you know that? You’re so, so brave.”

“Thank you.” Taylor murmured. “So… I saved your life and now I’m like this?”

“It’s not permanent.” Lisa assured her. “You’ll be back to normal in a few hours.” 

“Oh, thank god. I don’t want to live in kaleidoscope land forever.”

“It’ll pass.” Lisa promised, hand coming back up to her face. There was a very long and tense pause.

“Taylor?” Lisa asked, and Taylor noted how her voice had dropped, even softer and quieter. 

“Yes, Lisa?” Taylor responded, anxiety spiking. People didn’t change they way they were talking for no reason at all. 

“There’s something else I need to tell you.” Oh no. Oh god. What was this? She’d had too many revelations in the past few minutes. She couldn’t handle ano-   


“Okay.”  _ Fuck. _

“We’re not just friends. We’re partners.”

Oh. 

_ Oh!  _

“... like cape partners or-” 

“You’re my girlfriend, Taylor.”

“Ah.” Taylor felt like that deserved some contemplation. “I wasn’t… I didn’t think I was into girls.” 

“Yes, I know. You say that every time.”   


“Every time?”    


Lisa didn’t answer.

“Lisa? Lisa?”

Nothing. Taylor could feel her heart began to speed up, wherever that was in her body. She didn’t want to be alone. Not like this. Not while she was so helpess.

“Lisa, are you still there?” 

A hand around hers. It was warm and soft to the touch. 

“I’m here, Taylor.”   


“What did you mean, every time?” Taylor asked. 

“Nothing that matters, Taylor. I just feel very old today.” A soft pressure on her forehead. Taylor imagined that was Lisa kissing her.

It… didn’t feel  _ bad.  _

It didn’t feel bad at all.

“Rest, Taylor. Then we can go on our first date.” 

Taylor nodded, already falling asleep.

 

* * *

 

 

Lisa watched Taylor collapse onto the couch, like she always did. Her black hair a silken mess, her normally tense and drawn face slack with sleep. She looked so peaceful when she slept. Life had been far too cruel to her.

Too cruel to the both of them.

Lisa leaned back, letting her eyes drift up to the ceiling, watching the fan lazily drift in it’s cycle. 

Round and round, forever and ever.

“Really.” Lisa muttered to herself. It was a bad habit she’d developed while waiting for Taylor to recover. “It’s just my luck, isn’t it? To fall in love with her.” 

Not for the first time, she desperately wished that Taylor didn’t have powers. 

She was powerful—ridiculously powerful. She’d saved her and the rest of the Undersiders from certain defeat more then once.

But every time she used them, the minute she changed back to the girl Lisa had, despite her best efforts, fallen for—

Her memories would reset along with her body. 

Every.

Single.

Time.

She would slowly regain her senses, body restoring itself to its original form… but the mind couldn’t be healed that way. Everytime, it was permanent. 

She and Taylor had done this… nearly forty? Fifty? times now. Taylor would wake up, not remember who she was, and Lisa would silently shatter all over again. 

Sometimes, she was tempted to leave at just “friends.” She could never go through with it. Her heart ached too much not to have Taylor love her. She didn’t know what she would do without her next first date. 

She and Taylor would now always have another first date. And they would continue until one of them was dead. It was a cycle: Taylor would forget, Lisa would fill in the blanks. Love, comfort, safety, until the next mission. Taylor would try to avoid using her powers for as long as possible, but something always happened. Something always came up, and Taylor, the lovable, idiot fool, would always leap to Lisa’s rescue.

And then she’d die and be reborn again.

And again.

And again. 

Lisa wiped away the tears and rose from the couch.

No sense in crying. She had a date to get ready for. 

**Author's Note:**

> Well, a month late, and I did it. Here's your snip, T0PH4T.


End file.
